Ten Things You Should Know about Chocolate, Particularly if You are the Mother of a Teenager

Chocolate!  Enough said…almost.  I’m not a huge fan of regular (if there is such a thing) chocolate, but I do like dark chocolate.  I happened across a post that describes “10 facts about chocolate” (found at Info Barrel).  I’ve listed their ten facts and found at least a couple of facts somewhat surprising.  I’ve also added some commentary for no apparent reason:

1. It is a known fact that chocolate has caffeine in it. But did you know that you would have to eat more then a dozen chocolate bars to get the same amount of caffeine from a cup of coffee? There are about 5 to 10 mg’s of caffeine in one ounce of bitter chocolate, 5 mgs in milk chocolate, and 10mgs in a six-ounce cup of cocoa.  So, when a police officer eats a chocolate donut while drinking coffee, will the total caffeine content have any effect on her/his aim if they find it necessary to shoot at someone?  This might make an interesting study (if it hasn’t already been done).
2. Chocolate is actually a valuable energy source. A single chocolate chip can provide enough energy for an adult human to walk 150 ft.  I might walk 150 feet for a chocolate chip cookie.  It’s good to know I would have the energy to return to the sofa.
3. Chocolate has great health benefits. It helps with depression, high blood pressure, Tumors and Pre-menstrual syndromes.  Helps how?  Does it enhance or diminish these conditions?  I’m hiding the chocolate in our home if it enhances PMS.
4. Chocolate does not cause or aggravate acne, this is a myth.  This information is about 30 years late to be of any benefit to me (thanks, mom).
5. One ounce of baking chocolate or cocoa contains 10% of the daily recommended intake of iron.  Which is why one should consume at least 10 ounces per day – 11 should be even better.
6. Chocolate can be deadly for dogs. Chocolate contains an ingredient called “Theobromine” which can be toxic to a dogs central nervous system and cardiac muscles.  And for female dogs it enhances PMS.
7. People spend more than $7 billion dollars a year on chocolate.  If the people of the world will set aside their chocolate consumption for only 100 years, together we can bail out the American economic system and set the world right again.  Of course, we would run the risk of becoming depressed, pre-menstrual individuals who suffer from high blood pressure and tumors – Hey!  That sounds like today’s Wallstreet.
8. The per capita consumption of chocolate indicates that each person consumes 12 pounds of chocolate each year.  Chocolate must also inhibit weight gain, because my weight doesn’t increase by 12 pounds per year… it’s more like 8 or maybe 10…
9. Milk Chocolate is the most preferred type of chocolate, however dark chocolate is especially popular among men.  It’s good to know I hang with the “in” crowd.  I love dark chocolate – I must just ooze testosterone.
10. In Alfred Hitchcock’s movie “Psycho” chocolate syrup was used to indicate blood in the famous shower scene.  I had heard this.  Apparently chocolate films better (as blood) in black and white than anything else Hitchcock tried… plus he was able to use the leftover chocolate on his ice cream (ok, I made up the part about Hitchcock’s ice cream).

Pretend this is dark chocolate...

Enjoy!

The Top 15 Karaoke Songs (2008)

I happened across the top 40 Karaoke songs on the top 40 Karaoke music chart by EZ Tracks.  It’s not surprising (yet, still mildly disturbing) that Michael Jackson holds two of the top ten spots. 

I am speechless about a Kenny G song making this karaoke list because, having only heard a Kenny G song on the radio when I was not quick enough to change the station, I don’t remember his songs having lyrics.

I’ve linked each song to a YouTube video that had lyrics (if available).  If you’ve ever seen Wayne’s World (or maybe even if you haven’t), you will find yourself turned into a head banger at about the 4:08 point in Bohemian Rhapsody…

Here are the top 15 (of 40) for 2008:

1. Thriller by Michael Jackson
2. Dancing Queen by Abba
3. My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion
4. Eye of the Tiger by Survivor
5. Livin’ on a Prayer by Bon Jovi
6. Barbie Girl by Aqua
7. Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day
8. Beat It by Michael Jackson
9. Addicted by Enrique Iglesias
10. Forever in Love by Kenny G
11. I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor
12. Hero by Enrique Iglesias
13. What a Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong
14. Summer of ’69 by Bryan Adams
15. Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen

Enjoy!

A Day with THE Mouse

I took my kids to Disneyland yesterday (my wife was out of town) and learned a few important things.

1. September and January are the optimal times to go to Disneyland if you wish to avoid crowds.
2. A stroller is an annoyance to everyone but the person pushing it.
3. The Indiana Jones ride hurts.
4. My kids are cool.

Ok, so I already knew #4, but the others were kind of new – well, actually I had ridden Indiana Jones on a prior trip and had forgotten how bruised one can get.  It’s a fun ride, but it’s fun that hurts.

Regarding attendance, I noticed some interesting (at least to me) things about the way Disney takes care of business.  For example, although attendance appeared down, they did not want it to seem so.  As we were walking through the park, there was every indication that the park was full.  The lines for food seemed about right and the lines for rides were spilling out of the entrances to the rides.  However, I noticed that only a few of the windows at the food counters were open and most of the lines for the rides were fairly straight shots into the ride rather than the famous Disney twists and turns around ropes, chains, and poles.  I started asking employees if attendance was down and the typical answer was, “not for September.”  One employee actually was willing to admit that September and January are their slow months.  She attributed September slowness to “back to school” and January to “the rainy month.”  We were able to ride 15 rides, take in a show, and eat lunch and dinner in about an eight hour period.  We arrived at 9am and planned to stay until about 10 or 11pm, but by 5pm had done everything we wanted to do, so we left for home.

Most of the people who were at Disneyland yesterday were in Fantasyland.  We cut through there a couple of times on our way across the park.  The lines were really long (winding around) and strollers were everywhere.  It looked like the pictures I’ve seen of China with all the bicycles.  Almost all stroller drivers expected everyone else to yield (probably appropriate, but still annoying – and, yes, I did purposely observe their driving habits).  As we passed through I expected to see happy families (this is the “happiest place on earth” after all), but instead I noticed that very few people were actually smiling.  It was hot, kids looked tired, and parents looked bored.  Some fun!

As I mentioned, my kids are cool.  They had a great time, were polite to everyone, said thanks at all the appropriate times and to all the appropriate people, appeared genuinely grateful for the day, took turns at all the times they should have done so, and were patient in the lines (as they should have been, since our longest wait was 20 minutes at Space Mountain – no other line was longer than 15 minutes).  Actually, at one point I mentioned that the line to one ride looked kind of long from the outside and my kids looked at me and (almost) in unison said, “it is Disneyland, dad.  What do you expect?”

Their mother has raised them well.

http://www.perry.com/disney/indy/transprt.jpg

Impaling Adorable Animals – Nature’s Little Action Figure!

It seems that reality is sneaking into more than just our television shows.  We now have opportunity to teach kids the reality of life during playtime – The Avenging Narwhal Play Set with four magical tusks and three adorable animals to impale.

How could you go wrong with this as a birthday gift for your favorite niece or nephew?

Or, if you aren’t a fan of mimes, you might like the Avenging Unicorn:

Five for Friday – Song Parodies about Our Economy

As Ronald Reagan would quip, “Well, there you go” or as Bill Clinton might say, “It’s the economy, stupid.” 

Whether you want to cry or laugh, and whoever you prefer to listen to, “here you go” with “the economy” (and five song parodies):

Feels Like Hoover:

The Dollar and Its Diving:

All Pumped Up – Oil and Gas:

Bearish:

That Rose, Fanny Mae:

Enjoy (if you can)!

Save Our Souls – Fascinating Art by Rolando Cyril

I stumbled across this fascinating work of art and thought I should share it.  It is by Rolando Cyril.

http://www.starestudios.com/featured_artist/rolando-cyril_save-our-souls.php

Many are floating on the ocean
But who is sure to know about them?
Many are calling for help in the silence
Who shall recieve their message?

I found some bottles, but there is a problem
Who can help me now ?

S.O.S.

Sarah Palin – Cookin’ with Bullwinkle

I think all of these Sarah Palin photos that recreate her shooting some fictitious characters (and Bigfoot) are funny – but (as some have pointed out) she hasn’t yet shot a human.

With that disclaimer – here is at least one more photo.  I was directed to it by a friend and found that it originated at MSNBC:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/3036677/

Dogs Rock! – Church Wars

This is probably photoshopped, or it may be real, but this made me smile.  Follow the photos below to see a funny and public theological debate.

From our friends at PYZAM:

http://www.pyzam.com/funnypictures/details/8026?sort=popular

Have You Ever… A Meme for Lazy Bloggers (from Chartroose… or someone)

This meme for lazy bloggers is brought to you by Chartroose , who was too lazy to actually name names by tagging anyone.  Yet, I decided to lazily answer these “Have You Ever…” questions:

Have You Ever…

1. gone on a blind date? No.  Although I did go out with a girl who wore thick glasses once.

2. skipped school? Not really skipped, but I had several classes during high school that I only attended until the teacher took roll (and they never seemed to notice – or care – that I had gone missing).

3. been on the opposite side of your country? I live on the opposite side of my country from those who live opposite from me.  I have been to their side of the country as a visitor several times, but I’ve never lived outside of the southwest USA.  I’ve also been on the opposite side of other people’s countries.

4. swam in the ocean? Yes, as recently as last month… well, it was more like floating… actually, maybe more like bobbing… OK, I stood ankle deep and the waves almost got my shorts wet.

5. had your booze taken away by the cops? Yes, several times in high school.  No arrests, however.  I think they just wanted some free stuff for the weekend because they didn’t pour it out or give me a ticket, they just loaded it into their car and drove away.

6. lettered in a high school sport? Yes – basketball, cross-country, and track.

7. cried yourself to sleep? Nope.  Laughed myself to sleep several times, though.

8. played a musical instrument? Drums, if that counts as musical.

9. sung karaoke? Aye, captain.  I’m a glory hog.

10. cheated on an exam? Sure… once… at a time…

11. played spin-the-bottle? No.  I have used a bottle for other things, but not spinning.

12. laughed until some sort of beverage came out of your nose? It seems like it is likely, but I can’t think of a specific instance.  I did laugh until spaghetti almost came out of my nose one time, but that’s probably not something I would mention in a public forum like a blog… or whatever…

13. watched the sun rise with someone you care about? Yes, and married her.

14. ever been arrested? No, but like Chartroose, I was pulled over for doing about triple the speed limit.  The policeman received an urgent call as I handed him my license, then threw it back at me, said something like “you got lucky,” and sped away.

15. gone ice skating? Yes it was my PE class in junior high school – how weird is that? 

16. been skinny dipping? Yep – but I’m not that skinny anymore, so that halted that.

17. been on television? Yes, several times for various things – but never the feature, just one of the bit players.

18. thrown up in front of a date? No.  Although I have had someone throw up in front of me – I didn’t marry her.

That’s it! Go check out Chartroose’s answers (if you have the courage).

Sarah Palin – Evidence of Her Hit on Bullwinkle… Now Available on Blue Ray and DVD

Ok.  This will be the last one (sort of… unless another really good one shows up…).

This was created by nonnie9999 at Hysterical Raisins and the original post includes snippets from an article by guest columnist Reg Henry (Pittsburgh Post-Gazette) at the Seattle Post-Intelligencer.  It’s been floating around for a bit, but with my blazing blogosphere abilities, it only took me a couple of weeks to notice it.  I think it’s funny.

Enjoy!

http://mikk2.wordpress.com/2008/09/08/shootin-the-bullwinkle/